


Change Your Mind

by cinderlily



Series: Hurt and Heart [2]
Category: American Idol RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-04-24
Updated: 2010-04-24
Packaged: 2017-10-09 03:20:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,002
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/82468
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cinderlily/pseuds/cinderlily
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sequel to <a href="http://cinderlily.livejournal.com/529635.html#cutid1">Hurt and Heart</a>, takes place pretty much immediately after.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Change Your Mind

**Author's Note:**

> So I promised myself I would write this next part even before I finished Hurt and Heart. I just had the idea in my head. This was kind of tentatively called Corazon but I renamed it when I heard the lyrics to "Change Your Mind" by Sister Hazel. Thanks, as always, to my [](http://openice.livejournal.com/profile)[**openice**](http://openice.livejournal.com/) for her awesome betaing, sweet words, and constant reminder to you know. Keep writing. :) (And her incentives RULE! :D)

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
**Current mood:** |   
happy  
---|---  
**Current music:** | Sister Hazel::Change Your Mind (Live &amp; Acoustic)  
**Entry tags:** |   
[cook/archuleta](http://cinderlily.livejournal.com/tag/cook/archuleta), [fics](http://cinderlily.livejournal.com/tag/fics)  
  
  
__

  
_Hey hey   
what ya say   
We both go and seize the day   
'cause what's your hurry   
what's your hurry anyway_  
“Change Your Mind” – Sister Hazel

 

Not that he would say it to Cook, but Archie went back to work to save his sanity. Cook had time off (for his honeymoon, but neither one of them was going to bring that up) and kind of just lazed about Archie’s apartment. They had burned through the first season of _Heroes_ in the first few days (between make out sessions) and Cook had gone back to his and Amy’s place after two or three days to grab his cell phone charger, laptop, more DVDs and clothes and then they just were there. In the apartment. Together.

And Archie really liked Cook, he was pretty sure he _loved_ Cook, but he hadn’t shared space since he lived at home and that was 8 years previous and wow. He was going just a little bit cabin feverish. He finally broke on day four.

“I am almost out of vacation days,” he lied. He hated lying on principal, and it gave him a stomachache but he knew it was for the best.

Cook frowned, “Good point. And I should probably be looking for some place to move…”

“Wait, NO!” Archie froze. That wasn’t what he wanted, not at all. “You don’t have to do that. I just. I need to get back to work? There are weddings, I have obligations.”

Cook seemed to consider that for a minute before he nodded. “Well, um. I think maybe I will try writing then.”

“Don’t go back to work till you’re ready, Cook,” Archie pleaded. “I just. I can’t leave it to just June and Hannah. It isn’t fair.”

That, at least, was true, it wasn’t like he worked at a huge wedding planning place. There were three of them, he needed to pull his own weight there. When Cook lost the kicked puppy look on his face Archie relaxed. “But that isn’t until tomorrow…”

“Tomorrow, huh?” Cook stroked his beard. “What do you want to do tonight then?”

Archie pretended to think about it. “Well, I could make us dinner and then we could figure out what happened with glowing pretty emo boy?”

“Sounds good,” Cook smiled. “Though you might be surprised. Season two is kind of … different?”

Archie smiled and didn’t mention that really he didn’t care what happened. Watching TV meant folding himself into Cook’s side and when the time was right he could slip his hand onto Cook’s chest and then… well. They could make out like teenagers. (He wanted more, but was well aware of the fact that he was Cook’s first male relationship and wasn’t going to press the issue.)

*

He made his mother’s enchilada casserole and tried not to preen when Cook made noises like he was eating the best thing on earth and not just something Archie threw together last minute. Somehow the fact that he had defined a time of when they were going to be separated, even briefly, made Archie enjoy each moment a whole lot more. As they did dishes he hummed a John Mayer song that was stuck in his head and Cook sang along, and when they sat down on the couch Cook second guessed the _Heroes_.

“Maybe we can put in a movie? Or see what else is on? I don’t want to run through it all,” Cook smiled. “I would rather savor it.”

And it was all the same to Archie so he nodded and grabbed the remote to flip through. When they got to the _Game Show Network_ he didn’t recognize the game but left it on when he heard Cook make a quiet “aha!” noise. They watched the people on the screen make idiots of themselves and Archie slipped his hand down into where Cook’s was resting open palmed on the couch.

It still kind of gave Archie weird butterflies in his stomach when they first made contact, which was silly but true. He felt himself warm from his fingertips upwards and sighed softly as he shifted to lean in. The show was quickly forgotten as they spooned in together and Cook put a couple of lazy kisses on Archie’s shoulders. Cook muted the TV and shifted so they would be more comfortable.

“Tell me what you are thinking about.”

Archie wasn’t really thinking about much, to be honest, but he always hated when people answered that question with ‘Nothing.’ So he said the first thing that popped into his head. “I was thinking about this puppy.”

“Puppy?” Cook asked, leaned over to make eye contact.

Archie kind of blushed and looked away. “Yea, a puppy. I had a lot of time off during the last few weeks and I uh… kind of bonded with this little boxer puppy at the mall. She was tiny and kind of shy when I first met her but she warmed up quickly. She was black and white and her head was all white except for a small black patch in the center of her forehead that almost looked like a heart.”

He didn’t realize until he finished talking just how big of a lump he had in his throat, and it was kind of silly to be tearing up over a dog that wasn’t even his. He went on with a self-deprecating laugh. “I am sure she is adopted by now but… I just kept going back to see her.”

“Window-shopping?” Cook asked.

Archie laughed. “I guess. When we talked about it at the game I realized I hadn’t done it in years, but I think I was at the mall almost every day these last few weeks. The people at the pet store rolled their eyes when I walked in. The guys at Wetzel’s Pretzel’s know me on sight. I was kind of the walking pathetic.”

“I went back to the bar we went to probably every other night,” Cook admitted, his hand that was wrapped around Archie moved to lace their fingers together. “The band let me play without too much of a fight, but I think they were the first to know something was up.”

Archie turned his head and caught the scent of Cook’s shirt. He tried to not be too obvious as he inhaled again deeply. “Is that so?”

“Yea,” he could hear the smile in Cook’s voice. “For a guy who was supposed to be happy, I was covering the Cure an awful lot.”

It shouldn’t feel so good to hear that Cook was hurting, and on some level he ached just at thinking about it, it was oddly satisfying to hear. It almost made him feel retroactively less alone, and if he could think of the right way to say that without sounding like a total geek or getting it all wrong he would say that to Cook. Instead he just hummed into Cook’s side and smiled.

“I only know like two of their songs but they seemed happy enough,” he admitted, and he could feel Cook tense.

Before he got a chance to ask what he had said Cook pulled back to look him in the eyes. “You only know TWO songs by _the Cure_? Which ones?”

He had to seriously think about it and it looked like every passing second pained Cook so he felt kind of weird admitting, “Love Song and uh… Friday I’m In Love?”

“Are you kidding?” he didn’t wait for an answer, lifted his hips and shifted to grab his iPod out of his pocket. This was something that had happened a few times over the months of their friendship, and it had ended up with Archie with the earbuds shoved in his ears while Cook would shuffle through bands that he was totally astounded by Archie NOT knowing and pausing the songs to explain them before he played them.

This time though he only handed Archie one ear bud and then shifted them both so that he could take the other ear bud into his left ear. It was kind of ridiculous and made him feel like he was 17 and not 25 but it also felt insanely good to be so close with Cook. Cook was fidgeting with his iPod, no doubt finding the Cure in his collection and choosing just what to make him listen to.

“We got to start with the classics here,” Cook clarified and Archie found himself focused on Cook’s lips. “I can’t believe you have never heard _So What_.”

And with a click of a button the song started, so even if Archie had a response it would be drowned out by the lyrics. He didn’t mind, he leaned in and kissed Cook slow and sweet and then put his head back against the couch to really listen to the song.

*

The next morning he momentarily regretted his decision to go back to work as he had to get out of a bed where Cook was still sprawled out and asleep but by the time he got to work he knew it was the right thing to do. He walked in to find Hannah and June pretty much harried and tired. They both played it off like it wasn’t that big of a deal, but Archie saw quickly their relief.

“Are you sure you are ready to come back?” June asked.

Archie nodded. “I’m ready.”

“You look conspicuously happy,” Hannah said, slipping her fingers through her hair to pull it into a pony-tail. He recognized the eager intent look in her eyes. “Does this have anything to do with why I spent two thirds of my Saturday on the phone?”

He groaned, pressed his fingers into his eyes and shrugged. “Um... do I have to answer that?”

“**Now** you do,” Hannah pushed and when Archie turned to June to throw him a rope he saw it wasn’t likely.

If all went well, and Archie really… really… REALLY hoped it would, it was going to come out in the long run. His mind wandered to Cook, picturing him laughing at Archie for being afraid of telling a grand total of two people and something in Archie’s chest relaxed. “I guess I owe you an apology for making your Saturday so busy?”

The noise that Hannah let loose was a cross between a giggle and a squeal and she gave him a huge hug, “Totally forgiven. Oh DAVID!”

Over her shoulder he gave June a pleading look, she gave a ‘you did this to yourself’ type shrug but a fond smile.

“It is nice to know you took my advice,” June picked up a folder. “Now can we please do something related to our _job_? You remember, the whole wedding thing we play around with. “

Archie nodded gratefully. “Yes, please.”

*

By the time he got home he was an hour later than he had thought he was going to be. Turned out that while he was away they had actually needed him, which was nice to know but horrible to catch up with. They had a wedding that weekend that was somehow falling to pieces all around them. Floral shop lost the order, wedding site lost the count, bride had lost her mind. It was all pretty easy to fix but it required people and Archie couldn’t feel anything but hideously guilty and stayed later to make sure that he at least started on the catch up.

He had smiled at Cook’s car in the parking lot, not that he had expected him not to be there but it still felt awesome. He wasn’t sure what they were going to do with Cook’s living situation but he really didn’t mind coming home to an apartment with someone in it.

Two some ones, maybe… he opened the door and heard Cook talking in the kitchen. He blinked, weirdly nervous when he heard Cook’s voice kind of get high and nervous.

“Hey, Archie?” he called out and Archie resisted the urge to freeze in place. Who else would it be?

He swallowed and tried for relaxed, “Honey, I’m home?”

Another few steps in he heard Cook give a weird yelp and then something clatter on the floor. A flash of color streamed out of the kitchen and leapt at him. He had just long enough to process the need to kneel before a familiar set of paws hit his thighs.

“Oh my gosh,” he blinked. It couldn’t be.

Cook walked out of the kitchen with a paper towel on his wrist. “So… don’t be mad?”

Archie wasn’t mad, he was totally confused. It was his boxer puppy, in his apartment, in his ARMS. She licked happily at his face.

“I was bored earlier, and so I went to the mall,” Cook started, cautiously, almost like he was trying not to spook a horse. “And I saw the store… and was curious?”

In his arms she wiggled playfully and nipped at him. “OW!”

“She did that to me too!” Cook glared at her. “Bad Corey.”

Archie blinked up at him, “Corey?”

He was pretty sure he would never get sick of Cook’s ears turning pink when he was embarrassed. It was cute in the way he never thought his full body flush ever could be. Cook ducked his head and rubbed at his neck. “The heart on her head? Short for Corazon.”

“Nerd,” Archie laughed, his smile feeling like it might bust his face open.

There is a weird silence, kind of full and warm but not quite awkward and Cook kind of stands there, with an anxious look on his face. Archie can tell he should say something but can’t figure out what.

“So you bought her?” he tried, after a bit.

Cook smiled. “No, I rented her for the night, of course I bought her. She’s cute. And she had been there three weeks, and the guy at the store did remember you, and said you had been back a thousand times and they had almost been holding her for you.”

“Oh gosh,” he covered his eyes with his hand. “Yea, not even a little embarrassing.”

When he pulled his hand back Cook was giving him the same tentative look from earlier. “We can take her back…”

“NO!” he yelped, and Corey tried to jump out of his arms. He didn’t mean for that to come out as loud as it had. But Cook’s smile didn’t seem upset.

“I hoped you would say that.”

Archie got up and pushed himself into a grateful kiss. Corey thought this was the perfect opportunity to lick both chins at the same time, causing Cook to laugh into his mouth. Archie thought momentarily that his life was too perfect.

*

He had spent the Friday previous curled up watching the Cartoon Network’s marathon of Dexter’s Laboratory.

He walked in the door a week later to find his kitchen full to the brim with noise. Cook had set up a doggie gate to keep Corey out but that just meant she was at the door to the kitchen whining up a storm. In the kitchen Cook had music going, loud and aggressive and something that Archie was not familiar with (but smart enough to keep that thought to himself) and was belting out the lyrics over top the singer while he leaned over a pot of something on the stove.

It was weird, how his life went from one extreme to the other.

Corey’s attention diverted momentarily to Archie when he got in the door, lapping at his feet and tripping over her own feet in the process. He hadn’t really thought of the actual work behind a dog before, truth be told. And he was a little less than excited at four this morning when she woke him up to inform him she had peed on the floor but the warm licks and love she gave oddly made up for it.

“Hey there,” he offered his fingers to her. “Miss me?”

He gingerly placed his bag on the floor, even if he knew that no amount of noise would probably get over the music. He stepped over the gate and into his small kitchen. Whatever Cook was making smelled good, which was just a bonus. His day had been another long one; not making food was the best gift ever. He thought about just sliding up behind him like people did in the movies and on TV shows but looked warily at the large wooden spoon and steaming pot.

Instead he reached a hand out and touched Cook’s shoulder. Cook, who had been in the middle of a particularly high note, jumped a good half foot in the air and turned around with the spoon in his hand. Archie just barely was out of reach of what would have been a large red splat on his shirt, so he considered his decision a good one.

Cook smiled though, stole a kiss. “Hey, you’re home.”

“I am,” slipped out just before his throat tightened in sheer panic. Cook leaned in and kissed him and the moment of weirdness was gone but Archie couldn’t help but feel guilty at it. He leaned over to smell what was on the stove. “Is that chili?”

Cook smiled, “Yea, not quite ready though.”

“Has Corey been out lately?” Archie asked, Cook gave him a nod.

“Took her out like an hour ago. Before I started dinner.”

Archie bit his lip. “I think I might take her for a short walk. You know. It will give us longer to enjoy dinner?”

“Sure?” Cook tilted his head. “Something happen at work today?”

Archie shrugged. “Long day. I won’t mind stretching my legs a little. I’ll keep it short, I promise.”

“Well have fun?” Cook pressed a warm kiss to his lips. He pulled back and looked into Archie’s eyes for a moment.

He grabbed Corey’s leash from the key peg on the wall and climbed back over the gate to find Corey wiggling happily in front of him. It hadn’t taken long for her to know what her leash meant. She jumped up at him and he slipped the leash over her neck.

They get out the door and she is pulling him forward. His stomach still felt pretty tight and hollow and he couldn’t place where it was coming from. Wait… _home_. Cook had called it _home_ like it was seriously nothing at all. And somehow that made him feel like he had leapt off a cliff. His heart was in his throat, his pulse rapid.

To make matters worse he couldn’t see any of it in Cook. He seemed so calm and together it was kind of driving Archie absolutely nuts. He wondered if maybe it would be easier if Cook would just freak out. A little. Anything would be nice. Corey whined at him and he realized he had stopped in the middle of the courtyard and he couldn’t actually tell for how long.

He turned back towards the apartment, trying to swallow the guilt. He made it to the door and forced a smile. Cook leaned out from the kitchen.

“Good timing,” he said with a grin.

His grin felt fake but somehow Cook didn’t seem to notice. “Awesome.”

*

The feeling was mostly gone the next morning, just something in the very back of his mind. He wasn’t working that night so it was a day off. He had only been back to work for two days but he had missed getting to wake up with Cook. That made him feel better, at least. Yea he was nervous, but he was also happy. That, at least, meant something.

He woke up initially at seven thirty, far too early for Cook to be up and he slipped out of bed for just long enough to brush his teeth and take Corey out before he got back in bed and let himself lie there absorbing the moments. Cook shifted in his sleep to be closer to him and he shifted to be closer to him. He didn’t snore, not quite, but he did make these weird breathing noises that were kind of adorable.

When the noise stopped he closed his eyes automatically.

“You know, I would believe you were sleeping but that smile is not sleepy at all,” Cook mused and Archie blinked away fake sleep. Cook had a sleepy smile. “It’s okay that you were totally mooning after me, Archie.”

Archie glared. “I wasn’t mooning after you.”

“Sure, I believe you.”

“I was trying to figure out what that noise your nose makes means,” Archie said, amused by the indignant glare it got him.

Cook rolled away, like he might get out of bed and Archie reached his hand out to stop him. When he rolled back he was grinning. Archie couldn’t help but give him a kiss, and then Cook returned the favor. They settled into lazily making out, nothing too heated, just warm lips and hands and relaxed.

Archie could feel the need building at the back of his brain, his stomach coiling up tightly in his gut. He moaned appreciatively and let his hand drift from his hair down to his shoulder, then let it go just a little bit farther down. By the time it spread out on Cook’s bare stomach Cook seemed to tense.

Archie pulled back like he was burned, the moment instantly broken. “Oh… oh. Gosh. Too fast?”

“Maybe?” Cook said, his face flushed with either need or embarrassment Archie couldn’t tell. He closed his eyes briefly and then rolled onto his back. “I’m sorry. I just. Yea. Maybe too fast.”

Archie felt the coil in his stomach turn into something else, something slimy and gross. He didn’t want to pressure Cook into anything. He let himself push out the thoughts of what he had thought (hoped?) the rest of the morning would bring them and instead forced a smile.

“Want breakfast?”

So they didn’t talk about it. Instead they got dressed, put Corey on leash and walked down to a nearby breakfast place that had great food and an outdoor patio that was just shaded enough to enjoy the September breeze.

*

Maybe it was just Archie’s imagination but they actually didn’t talk about much over the next few weeks. Well, that wasn’t true. In fact they talked all the time. When they went for walks with Corey, or when they made food. When Archie got home from work sometimes it seemed like Cook had held back his words all day and he would just let it all go on him.

The thing was they talked about everything BUT the one thing they probably should. They talked about Corey, of course, they talked about their childhoods, their jobs. Archie discovered he actually didn’t think baseball was that boring once he learned the rules a little more, and Cook ended up really liking Dexter’s Laboratory.

They didn’t, however, talk about who they were, never really looked towards a future. Nor did they set up any boundaries. And Archie was mostly okay with that, as most nights the only reason he wanted to come home was to find Cook singing while he cooked, or with his huge headphones on while he listed to a CD he was supposed to be reviewing (relaxed and happy, even if he ended up ripping the band apart he always looked so happy while he listened to it).

Until, that is, everything changed.

Work had been a nightmare, truly and absolutely all forms of it. He had walked in to find Hannah had went through his files and just LEFT THEM on top of his desk in no semblance of order and he had to spend twenty minutes to just get through them, which put him in the position of having to really hustle to get to his meeting with a new couple. The new couple turned out to completely crazy, spent the entirety of their meeting contradicting each other making Archie choose sides. By the time he got into his car at the end of the day he was at his wits end and so tired he could barely see straight.

It was still early, though, weirdly enough. Even if Archie was sure it had to be midnight it was just past 4:30.

When he got out of his car it was to find Cook already outside, giving Corey a walk. He looked good, sun kissed and relaxed and happy and Archie felt horrible about how jealous that made him. He had watched Cook's writing process, seen him go through some pretty huge writer's block but overall he had yet to see the downside of Cook's job. Archie loved his job, LOVED IT, but on the same note some days he couldn't quite remember what got him into it.

Cook grinned hugely at him and looked down at Corey to tell her, "Look who we ran into."

Corey jumped at Archie's thighs, her nails kind of dug into his pants and he batted at her. Cook gave him a confused and concerned look, which should make him feel something other than annoyed but it doesn't.

"You okay?" Cook leaned over and gave him a peck on the lips.

Archie shrugged. "Long day. Did you just start or were you finishing?"

"Just about to head home," Cook smiled again. "Perfect timing."

They headed back to the apartment with Archie kind of glowering at the ground and Cook talking about what he and Corey had done all day. It should be awesome to hear about the events, it was one of his favorite times of the day (Cook had a voice he would play with when he was acting as Corey, who he would act like had made suggestions and quips about what they had done. Archie thought it was crazy, but kind of cute) but it doesn't.

Cook has the key, unlocked the door and took Corey off leash. Archie was barely a step in the door when he looked to see four boxes and three duffels on the floor in the middle of his living room. Two guitars propped against the couch.

"What is all this?" he knew how childish his voice sounded.

He got a shrug for a response, "Oh yea. Amy called yesterday to tell me she was moving into another place and had packed up my stuff and that I should just come and grab it."

"Why didn’t you tell me last night?"

“I didn’t think about it,” Cook said and looked taken aback. “Is this a problem?”

Archie balled his fists at his side, his voice came out tight and higher than he expected, “You just can’t take over the apartment, Cook.”

“I am going to unpack it, I just got it a few hours back,” Cook’s face had gone from relaxed to annoyed.

Archie could feel the blood in his veins start to boil, “Where?”

“I don’t know, it isn’t exactly like the apartment is full or anything.”

“Just anywhere?”

Cook frowned, his eyebrow almost knit together in concentration. “What is this really about?”

“It’s about my life and my apartment,” he gritted out, because he couldn’t bring himself to admit that there was other things behind this. He knew he was in over his head, knew he could just step down at take some deep breaths and that everything would come back into focus but just… couldn’t. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t step away from the situation.

“_Your_ life and _your_ apartment?”

It sounded stupid coming from Archie’s mouth, but out of Cook’s mouth it sounded twisted and cruel. He tried to start something to say to him but nothing seemed to work out. He sat down on the couch, breathed in and felt the anger coursing through his veins slowly start to dissipate and morph into some painful ache.

“I have lived alone since I graduated college, I have structure and order and I like it. We have barely known each other for like six months and now we live together and you are everywhere. Your stuff is everywhere, my stuff is everywhere, **you’re** everywhere. It just… feels like too much right now.”

He looked over to find Cook staring at him. Cook looked tired, far more tired than he had when they first started the conversation and Archie felt exceptionally stupid. This is why he hadn’t talked about it yet, he could never quite get his words out right and now he has totally hurt Cook and that was the last thing he wanted to do. His pride and embarrassment kept him from reaching out and snagging his hand and begging for them to just start it all over.

With a sigh of frustration Cook stood up and grabbed his keys off the coffee table. “I am going for a drive. I’ll… uh. I’ll be back.”

Archie nodded but didn’t look at him. He stared at the table in front of him instead. He felt the lump in his throat grow when the door closed and Corey, who had been kind of curled up on herself in her crate came out after a minute to jump on the couch next to him. He should shoo her off, they had agreed not to let her on the furniture but he slipped his hand onto her head and rubbed her ears.

She looked up pitifully at him, her large brown eyes blinked. He knew she was probably just uncomfortable about the yelling but could almost hear Cook’s version of her voice asking, ‘What just happened, Papa?’

“I screwed up,” he answered, and maybe he was going crazy. He was talking to his DOG. She licked his hand and nudged at him to get another scratch at her ears. “I shouldn’t have yelled at him. I just. So fast and so much, Corey.”

She shifted closer to him and snuggled in to fall asleep, almost instantly beginning to snore. He sighed. He probably should be telling this to Cook, rather than Corey. He was pretty sure if he called him he would come straight back but he thought maybe he should just let him go for a while.

His eyes wandered around the room and felt even more guilty at the fact that there really wasn’t THAT much to be upset about, a few guitars, yes, and a couple boxes. It wasn’t like his living room was over taken. It just felt… weird? Unsettling. That was the word. Unsettling. He wondered if he stared at the walls long enough if it would help.

Like when he moved into his first place by himself, five years before. He remembered coming home everyday and walking in shocked on a daily basis that nothing had changed while he was gone. He had spent all of his childhood finding his stuff moved and then when he moved in with roommates it hadn’t changed. Coming back to a place that remained completely the same all day long was bizarre. It took almost a year to get used to that.

His stomach ached again at the thought. He didn’t want to take a year to get used to coming home to Cook. He wondered if he would even get the chance.

The click of the front door alerted him to Cook coming back, but Corey jumped up just in case he missed it. He looked down at his hands while he heard Cook kneel and try and talk Corey back down, it was nice to know she had bounced back so quickly. After a minute Cook sat down in the love seat across from him , and Archie flicked his eyes to meet Cooks. He looked like he might have been crying, red around the corners of his eyes. Archie wondered what it meant that he hadn’t yet.

“Hey,” Cook said cautiously.

Archie swallowed around the lump in his throat. “I’m sorry.”

“I’m sorry too.”

“What do you have to be sorry about?” Archie perplexed. “I’m the one who yelled at you for like the stupidest reason ever.”

Cook smiled a little, sadly though. “I kind of jumped into your life in a crazy fashion. I do that… sometimes. Kamikaze approach to relationships. I don’t mean to. I just do. It felt right, you know? I shouldn’t have pushed you.”

“It felt right on my end too,” he said, keeping the desperation to a minimum. “It feels right… I just. It was a long day, and I came home and all of a sudden there was stuff. And I got nervous, you know? I shouldn’t have yelled. Just… how do you still like me? I mean. I sing in the shower and I kick in my sleep and … If we were just dating I could hide that. But you are HERE. And I do it ALL the time. And we just met like six months ago, this should be crazy. I don’t do crazy…well. I am crazy, but I don’t _do_ crazy I plan. I am a planner. It’s my job! And I …”

Cook held up both hands. “Dude, you are rambling.”

Archie flushed. “Sorry. I just. This feels right, you know? And that is a little bit scary.”

“A little bit?” Cook arched an eyebrow. “You are light years ahead of me, Archie.”

“Really?”

Cook gave a sad laugh, “Archie. A few weeks ago I was going to get _married_. To a girl I had known from the time I was 5. Then I met you and everything kind of changed. You were there, and then you weren’t and now you are here. And I am in your house. And my family is angry at me, my best friend won’t speak to me and I feel like a guest here sometimes, which I guess I am. My whole life is different. I am scared senseless.”

That is weirdly good to hear, and not at the same time. He hated the idea of Cook being scared, or of being hurt. He wanted to kiss away the frown on his face. Wanted to tell him he was lying when he said he was a little scared, that he was petrified. But that maybe it would work if they were both scared. He paused to scrutinize the look on look on Cook’s face. It was tight and pained like he had taken a shot of lemon juice, something he wasn’t used to seeing on Cook. Well, other than a few times before the wedding. Which didn’t help the feeling in Archie’s stomach at all.

“I should find an apartment. Maybe in the same area?” Cook offered tentatively.

Archie heart dropped. “What about Corey?”

That seemed to leave Cook quiet and thoughtful. This felt distinctly like a break up. _Barely a month _, Archie thought morosely.

“She’s yours,” Cook said, finally. Then he kind of paused to put a hand out to her. She gave him happy licks, unaware of the conversation over her head. He offered her a sad, “I will be over a lot.”

Archie shook his head. “I don’t want that.”

Cook tensed. “You don’t want what?”

“I want you here all the time,” Archie’s voice was quiet but surprisingly clear. “I want you here ALL. THE. TIME.”

He heard him swallow. “Look, we jumped in head first.”

“We did,” Archie agreed. “But you said it felt right, and it still feels right to me.”

Cook quirked an eyebrow at him, “If it felt right we wouldn’t be having this fight.”

“We are going to fight,” Archie pointed out. “We will. And it won’t change even if you move out. And I don’t want you to move out. Shouldn’t that play a role? I mean… Do-do you? Wanna move out?”

Cook shook his head.

He breathed in deeply, enjoying the way that his heart beat was back in his chest again. “See? That should matter. You don’t want to leave, I don’t want you to leave. If Corey could vote… I’m sure she wouldn’t want to come from a broken home.”

“A br-broken home?” and then Cook is off. A few loud barks and then he started to laugh so hard that no sound came out, just shaking of his shoulders with a fist to his mouth. After a minute Archie is almost indignant. It isn’t _that_ funny. Cook wiped at the side of his face.

Archie huffed. “Great.”

“Okay,” Cook offered. “You’re right. I guess we are going to fight. But I am going to need you to be a little more open with me here. It sounded like you have been boiling for weeks. I can’t read your mind.”

He had to admit that was pretty much true. Maybe he hadn’t entirely let himself think about it but most of what he had said earlier had been on his mind for the entirety of the two months. He nodded, ”You too though. Tell me when you are scared? And you don’t have to stay here. If you don’t want to. If I get to be… um. Too much? I mean, you might have to um… talk me through my crazy sometimes. I can get a little closed off? When I get nervous or overwhelmed. Which is often.”

“Will do,” Cook mock saluted him. “But as a warning, I don’t think I am going to want to move out. You might be stuck with me.”

Archie moved himself to get up and walk over to Cook, seated himself carefully on the edge of the loveseat. Cook put his hand out and let his hand fall on top of Archie’s thigh and squeezed.

“So… um…” Archie said, his hands tightly locked in front of him. “I love you.”

Cook’s hand froze, and Archie couldn’t bring himself to look over at him. The silence was long and awkward and Archie frowned.

“Too fast?”

Cook laughed again, loudly but stopped far quicker. He put his hand on Archie’s chest and pushed him back against the love seat. “You crack me up, Archuleta.”

“Wha—“ he started to ask but Cook swallowed it with a kiss and then another.

Cook pulled back and lay his forehead against Archie’s. “I love you, too.”

His stomach relaxed and he could feel his toes curl slightly. He smiled and said the first thing that came to mind, “That’s nice.”

The laugh Cook gave didn’t even make Archie jump he had almost expected it. He leaned in to press a kiss to Cook’s cheek. Cook turned his head just in time that it caught the corner of his lip. Again Cook pushed him back and kissed him fiercely. He could probably get used to this.

Somewhere he lost track of time. Cook's hands were going through his hair and his lips sometimes jumped off of his mouth to catch other bits of him in small kisses, his neck and his cheek and his ears. He never knew where to put his hands but kind of took Cook's cue and slipped them in his hair, where he felt the product Cook used to get his hair into the faux hawk. It wasn't crunchy or oily but more soft and easy to get distracted by.

He moaned appreciatively into Cook's mouth when his hands dropped from his hair to his shirt and unbuttoned the top button. It switched from hot and heavy to slow and sweet by the time his buttons were all open and Cook's hand slid in to trace weird circles onto his belly. Archie smiled into the kiss and nudged him to lie down a little on the couch. When he obliged Archie lies on top of him, sure to put an elbow out for support.

Cook was just in a plain white t so Archie did the next best thing, slipped his hand down and unbuttoned the top of his jeans. Cook stopped mid-kiss. This wasn’t as far as they had gone but it was pretty evident on both sides that it was going to go much farther this time.

“Are you sure?” Cook asked, voice quiet and scratchy.

Archie nodded fervently. Had been ready for weeks, but had respected Cook’s boundaries. “Do you…?”

Cook stopped him with a kiss for his answer. He rubbed himself down against Cook’s lap and felt the flush on his face start with the noises it made Cook make. He lifted himself off of him long enough to shuck his pants and to let Cook wiggle himself out of his jeans. It should be ridiculous to see Cook trying to shimmy the jeans off but instead he finds it hot. (Only Cook could make that look good.)

“We should…” Archie said, distractedly licking his lips.

Cook quirked an eyebrow, “We should what?”

“Go to the bedroom?” he flushed more. It was embarrassing that at his age he couldn’t say things like that without feeling like a total goober.

Cook let out a low throaty groan and tugged him down for a forceful kiss, “Totally can wait.”

Archie landed almost perfectly aligned with him, he felt Cook arching his back slightly to rub up against him and… Oh gosh it felt amazing. So amazing that for a split second he is caught off guard by the sudden cold spot on the back of calf. He turned to give a yelp.

“Oh no, _Corey_,” he groaned.

Cook’s eyes are a bit glassed over, and he blinked at Archie blankly. “Not exactly pillow talk…”

“No, COREY,” Archie lifted himself off to point at where the dog was seated staring up at them. “Oh my gosh. We are totally taking this to the bedroom.”

Cook put a hand down to offer to Corey and smiled when she licked his palm, “You realize she is a dog, right?”

“COOK!”

“Alright , alright. We’ll go.”

ETA: Now with a Coda "[every sign pointed straight for you"](http://cinderlily.livejournal.com/570738.html)


End file.
